2014考研英语写作范文模板点评及答案(2014考研英语写作范文模板点评答案)

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写作原文

2014考研英语写作范文模板点评及答案(2014考研英语写作范文模板点评答案)

Inthepicture,thereisanunbalanced(改为imbalanced,imbalance表示“失衡,不平衡”,而unbalance表示“[力]失衡,精神错乱”)seesawonwhichtheonesidesittingawomanwithherbodyshaking(可改为whereawomenissittingwithherbodyshakingontheoneside),andontheotherside,15menaregoingdownontheirkneesasking(改为toask,用动词不定时表示目的)thewomantomarrythem.Thepicturerevealstheunbalanced(改为imbalanced)sexratioinourcountry.Sowhatcausesthisphenomenon?Inmyopinion,therearemainlytworeasons.First,theconception"prefersonstodaughters"isverypopularinourcountry.Through(改为Though,through为介词“通过”,though则表示“虽然”)itisnotasintensiveasintheoldsociety,mostparents,especiallytheonesinremoteareasstillwanttohaveason.Furthermore,alongwiththe"Birthcontrol"policy,someparentswould(情态动词使用不当,可改为may)choosetoabandontheirchildwhentheyknowsheisagirl.Inordertosolvethisproblem,variousmeasureshavetobeadopted.Astothegovernment,itshoulddrawuplawstoreinforcethepunishmentofabortion.Astotheparents,theyshouldchangetheirprejudicetochildren,andbuilduptheconceptionof"Itmakesnodifferencesifthebabyisagirloraboy".Ithinkunderthejointeffortofthegovernmentandtheindividuals,theconditionofunbalanced(改为imbalanced)sexratiowillbeimprovedinthenearfuture.

总体点评

整体来说,文章写得不错;但还存在个别简单的语法错误。作者在写作完之后若可以花费几分钟时间来回读文章,便会减少不必要的错误。考研作文的整体思路你已经基本掌握,后面要做的就是多积累高分佳句,为自己的文章增彩;再者,写完之后一定要认真检查,减少失分点。加油吧,祝你考研成功!

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